Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Email #55

today's is part of a new corporate sponsorship. ok maybe not.

hey keith,
guacamole carmel setter. indonesia bagpipes.
YOU HAVE EATEN YOUR LAST KRISPY KREME, BEGGAR!
next time, you spring for the doughnuts, fucker.
eric

see you tomorrow, ya dweedle wheedlers!

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Email #54

today's is the first nice one i guess.

hey keith,
i know we've had our differences over the years, but at least you're not kevin mchale.
eric

see you tomorrow, ya touchy-feelies!

Monday, February 26, 2007

Email #53

well, here's today's

hey keith,
DON"T LOOK UNDER THERE!
eric

see you tomorrow, yabutts.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Email #52

today, a poem.

keith,
pajama, banana, copacabana!
you smell like all three!
eric

i'm off tomorrow, so see you next week, ya bed wetters!

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Email #51

movie day again!

hey keith,
your chart says you're all fucked up.
eric

see you tomorrow, ya pistachio nuts!

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Email #50

holy shit, look who's 50!

hey keith
you drool when you talk. you waste too much time counting your change. you don't realize how much easier it is to just forget about it. all this shit is driving you crazy!
eric

see you tomorrow, ya new forties!

Monday, February 19, 2007

Email #49

Let's all take a trip back to 1993.

hey keith,
you better chickety-check yo'self before you riggety-wreck yo'self
eric

see you tomorrow, ya dirty-gym-sock-masturbators!

Friday, February 16, 2007

Email #48

today's message is in a secret language! we have a surplus of letters to send here so were holding over until april 2nd, aka opening day.

hey keith,
oday ouyay ikelay otay ooppay? eway inkthay ayay oday!
eric

see you next week, ya m.u.s.c.l.e. men!

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Email #47

here's today's selection, folks.

keith,
Lemmy is god.
eric

yes he is. see you tomorrow, ya horseshoe biters!

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Email #46

Today, we pay tribute to an american hero.

hey keith,
i must have taken a wrong turn at albequerque.
eric

see you tomorrow, ya maroons!

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Email #45

Today's selection was composed, by me, using refrigerator magnets at home.


hey keith,
eat dog crap,
bug boy!
eric

see you tomorrow, ya sap suckers!

Monday, February 12, 2007

Email #44

hi everyone. will this be the last week for us? or will we press on? stay tuned to find out!

hey keith,
you've got a wicked snaggletooth, man. you look like my damn cat.
eric

see you tomorrow, ya snooker-fuckers!

Friday, February 9, 2007

Email #43

here is today's letter. short and very sweet!

hey keith,
scrotum!
eric

see you next week, ya skittle-diddlers!

Thursday, February 8, 2007

Email #42

today, we talk about spelling.

hey keith,
i before e except after c, bitch.
eric

see you tomorrow, ya smut peddlers!

Friday, February 2, 2007

Email #41

i can't feel my fingers. no more typing. here's today's letter.

hey keith,
it's just a matter of time. you know it has to happen. there's no use putting it off any longer. no matter how much you try, you can't stop it. look out below! poop!
eric

see you next week, ya corn-poopers!

Thursday, February 1, 2007

Email #40

good morning. look what i did.

hey keith,
have you ever played pictionary? i bet you can't even draw a decent shark. you sir, are no arteest!
eric

see you tomorrow, ya smelt-smellers!